Opinions

Everyone has an opinion, most of us try to express our often. My question is why? Why to we try so hard to express our opinions? Is it just because we want people to listen to us or do we just want to sway others to our opinions? If we want people to just listen and respect it- how to we know they are really listening? How do listen to an opinion and acknowledge it, but at the same time express your own? I hate expressing my opinion and someone acting like i didn't say anything?! I do wonder if this is on me or the other person? Am I the one that thinks they are not listening, simply because they didn't change their opinion to mine? Or is it really that they don't hear me? How do we graciously offer and receive opinions?

Tears...

I usually hate that burning sensation on my lower lids, or that lump in my throat...but sometimes the cool drippings down my cheeks are exactly what I need. I think sometimes tears can be the best way to let your emotions out-it is often more effective than screaming- although sometimes that feels good to. It never ceases to amaze me what people can endure through out a day and how different things unravel different people. I watched my boss get beat down by a man's onslaught of words- yet she stood there and took it with a smile- granted I think that was a way for her to cover up the fact that she was grinding her teeth- but still, I stood there just listening and nearly cried! The way that the man spoke to her was completely degrading and no matter what- nobody deserves that- yet she took it in stride- I on the other hand was ready to break into tears after I was passed over for advice all day- and being used mainly as a mule- that is what i get for being 25 i guess- I hate that I am really a strong outspoken person, but that has bitten me so many times in the past- that at this job I try very hard not to speak out to often- or try to be to domineering and now that seems to be biting me in the butt! How can you assert yourself without coming off as a control freak? How can I prove that I can be a great worker, but not get used/abused? Why do people expect you to be able to do everything? Why is not ok to just have a "job"- a task that is tailored for/by you-one you can do to perfection over and over? No instead they want you to do several hundred things well- Its lunacy to me! Am I the only that feels this way? Is that why I end up having issues with everyone I work for? Is it truly me or the jobs I find myself in..?

Finally- someone listened

Well today I finally went somewhere that actually thinks that something may be wrong with me..I mean besides the obvious idiosyncrasies and anxiety. :) I spoke with someone that looked at me eye to eye, comforted me with an explanation that actually made sense to me. He spoke to me like I knew something was wrong with my body. He spoke to me like I wasn't crazy or a hypochondriac- now let's hope my blood work actually turns something up- but I think these doctors will not let me leave with out an answer or solution to my problem...wish me luck!